Well, it has taken me a few days to write this post. Mostly because it is tangled with major nostalgia, a need to let go, an excitement to move into the new, and because my life is just insane this month (most specifically, the next 2 weeks.)
As I had mentioned before, my 3 best girl friends are moving away in July. Brit left at the beginning of the month. I cried quiet a bit. And tonight, my best friend Anne leaves for Guatemala. This one is going to be insanely hard. We have on and off lived together for the past 5 years. She and I are so similar it is disgusting haha. Stubborn, strong willed, you know how it goes. And miss Katie leaves in a week. (Katie, Anne and I have been like sisters since the beginning of college 5 years ago.) If I had nothing to do right now, I would be crying every second. But thankfully, I have been non stop busy for the past month, and because of what happened on Monday, I have been INSANELY busy this week.
To preface the intensity of what I have been up to this week, let me explain a few of the other plans I have had brewing for the end of the month:
I am moving out of my house on July 31st, seeing as all the girls are leaving for other states and countries and only the 2 boys and I will be left. So my plan was to move in to my friend Danielle's house which is about 10 blocks from where I live now. I had figured that having my 3 best friends move away at the same time would already make my life way different in the fall. So staying the same neighborhood, still close to my best guy friends would maybe provide some stability for me amid other transitions. Plus, my boyfriend is moving up here from California at the end of September and he will be moving into the house that I am moving out of!
So there is my first big news: my boy toy is moving to Seattle! We went to the same high school and knew each other through the grapevine. But have been diggin' on each other since Christmas, and officially dating since February.
So anyway, I was going to move in with Danielle which I was super pumped about because she is my only other friend who has done Etsy, she is super creative, so sassy, so nice, just all around bomb dot com. You can check out her shop here. And I'd only be living 10 blocks from my love! But that also meant that I would need to continue on in my job filler search. Which sucks. I do blog makeovers, sell jewelry through etsy, work for an artist on and off, do freelance illustration, i'm in a band AND I nanny. But still, because I don't make much doing any of those things (and am not getting enough clients yet to fill my time with just art making) I still need to get another job. Shoot me.
I don't want another job. I just want to fill my time with pursuing the arts! The past year has definitely been a big struggle for me, and I applied to a variety of places that I didn't fully want to work at. But with this economy, graduating when and where I did, I had to just apply anywhere. And because of the economy, I didn't get any of the jobs (which I never really liked in the first place.) It has been a hard year, but I'm alive, and I've managed to still pursue the arts a little tiny bit along the way. And living with the lovely miss Danielle meant that I would still have to pursue job fillers that I didn't care about just to survive and pay the rent.
BUT...here is the biggest news...
On Monday, I got a call from a family that I have been nannying for every so often, for about 2 years. Their momma's name is Karin and she is so rad. She is only about 10 years older than me, has 3 daughters between 9 years old and 2 months old, and she runs her own dance company. (She is incredibly talented.) Her kids and her husband are just all so awesome and I love them all. Anyway, Karin called with a big huge proposal...
She and her family had been thinking and praying about me and trying to figure out ways in which they could encourage me in my pursuit of having a full career in the arts. I graduated from undergrad a year ago with a B.A. in Studio Art with an emphasis in Illustration. And my ultimate goal for the next five years is to pursue illustration, graphic design, and Etsy as a career. Karin has always been especially encouraging to me, really driving me to pursue the arts with full force, because she has been there and her dreams are really starting to take off with her dance company!
Her proposal was this: They want me to move in with them for a year, rent free. WHAT!!!??!! Yes, seriously. And on top of that, they wanted to turn part of the garage in a studio space for me so that I can focus way more on my art. Hooooly crap. I didn't even know how to react. Needless to say, I thought about it, prayed about it, wrote a huge Pros vs. Cons. list and decided.
I'm doing it!
They live in a different neighborhood of Seattle, but it is one that I love and have lived in before. They have a little apartment in which I will have my own little room that I can paint however I want. Hoorah! I haven't been able to paint my bedroom in any of the house and apartments I have lived in previously. In mulling over different ideas of what this coming year should look like now because of this awesome opportunity, I think I have finally come to some major decisions.
In just a WEEK:
- I am going to be living with Karin and her family for a year in Ballard, Seattle.
- I am going to do a little bit of assistant work and design for Karin in exchange for living free. I'll be designing a logo for her company, helping her learn how to do twitter/facebook/online promotion etc. I am so pumped.
- Instead of having a studio in their basement (since I get depressed in the dark winters of Seattle and it is pretty dark down there, and I will need reason to get out of the house) I have decided to rent a small studio space/office near the Seattle zoo. It is super duper cheap, about 5 times cheaper than my house rent would have been. I think it will make me really motivated to wake up at the same time everyday, get dressed in not slobby clothes, go to work and get my art on! On top of that, I think it will help me feel less stressed about my art based self employment jobs because I will be able to leave my work there and come home to a space where I won't feel guilty if I am not working every second of the day.
- I will be saving money for grad school, survival, and the future! And I will be able to put my money towards useful things for my career.
- I will be able to walk to my 2 other closest girl friends' houses.
- I wont have to get a job that I don't care about!
- I can focus all my work energy on blog makeovers, secret projects with other bloggers like Andrea and Kyla, freelance illustration, blogging, and filling up my etsy shop with new goodies. And room for Northwest adventures in hiking, rock climbing, biking and such.
- I will be more focused and will be able to focus my attention on the things I care about most!
Thankfully, and to add to the chaotic rush of this coming week, I am driving down to California from Seattle on August 1st, driving my car behind Katie's. I will be in my hometown for a few days and will spend a few days visiting my boyfriend at the camp he works at in Yosemite National Park. And then I'll drive back up to Seattle by myself on August 9th.
I am pretty overwhelmed with every type of emotion at the moment. There is so much happiness for the opportunity presented to me by Karin and her family. And total heartbreak over the fact that, once I leave the camp where my boyfriend works and cry a good amount about that, I will have to drive 14 hours back up to Seattle by myself, knowing that my very best friends will not be there to greet me ever again. Woo...alright, I just looked up at Katie and Anne and tears started squirting out of my eyes. Time to end this crazy tale. I can barely type anymore.
I am excited that I can share all this with you my friends. Pray that I can stay sane through all of this and that I don't totally dry up from releasing every tear my body can muster from crying my eyes out over not knowing when I will see my best friends again. Thank God for skype, phones, emails, and real paper letters for my far away best friends. ...and thank God for boyfriends moving to Seattle, filling up my person to person best friend need.
See why it has taken me quite a few days to just sit down and write this? Can I get through 5 hours without crying? It is pretty damn difficult.