This week I painted my nails a Robin's Egg Blue with a nail polish from Urban Outfitters. It is such a calming and refreshing color. It doesn't really go with any of the earth toned clothing I've been wearing lately, but it makes me really happy to see it when I glance down at my hands. :)
Well today my counseling session went really well. Once again, I had to go back to some traumatic experiences to see where my mind would wander from that hard beginning point. After an hour of processing, my counselor asked me to go back to the point where we began the therapy session at. My feeling of stress about the traumatic experience had decreased a lot after an hour of therapy and I felt really good about that. She had me think about the traumatic experience and reflect on some positive things about who I was in the moment of experiencing trauma. And I was really happy to reflect on the fact that I was composed, compassionate and responsible while going through a painful experience at the age of 6.
I am proud of the person I am. As I reflect back on my past, I am proud of myself that I have not played a victim in my hard circumstances. I am proud of myself that I have chosen to seek kindness and compassion my whole life. I am proud of myself that, because I lacked good leadership by women when I was growing up, I have sought to be a good leader for myself and a good leader for other women my whole life. I have helped raise my sisters, and they are beautiful people <3 I have been an RA and I loved and nurtured the 35 girls on my floor during that year. More than wanting to get good grades, I wanted to make sure they were supported and loved. I listened to their stories of trauma and I provided love and support to them. I have been a camp counselor, and an enormous amount of young girls at that camp felt safe and comfortable enough with me to share their incredibly sad and traumatic experiences. I use my blog to spread happiness and love to my readers. I try to be honest in a way that lets YOU know that I am hear to listen, to nurture, and to encourage.
I had a hard time growing up, and I grew up fast to protect myself. But I am thankful that I have managed to turn some of my defenses into areas of compassion for women who have been through trauma like me. I am proud of myself for choosing to turn my hurt into room to relate to others, a reference for remembering why others need love, guidance and hope.
Last week, I told you how I painted my nails so that I could have a visual reminder that I am investing in myself and taking care of myself. I asked you if you had painted your nails as a remembrance to love yourself, to send me photos. And here they are:
Aren't these fun! Great job ladies!
Now this week, as I look down at my Robin's Egg Blue nail polish, I am choosing to remember why I am proud of myself. Last week, I focused on the fact that I deserve to be treated well. And I want to continue to remember that. But this week, I really want to focus on why I am proud of myself. I'd love to encourage you to do the same for yourself. Why are you proud of yourself? If you aren't proud of anything about yourself, look deep into yourself and find it. Everyone has reason to be proud of themselves. You deserve to treat yourself well! And part of that means remembering why you are valuable. Be proud of yourself for facing any challenges you have experienced in your life. Be proud of yourself for taking care of those around you. Be proud of yourself for pursuing goals. Be proud of yourself for making yourself a good meal, for taking a shower and brushing your teeth, or treating yourself to your guilty pleasure after you have accomplished something you set your mind to. Be proud that you have not only survived any challenges in your life but that you are a WHOLE person, even when you feel you are lacking because of hardships.
You deserve to be treated well. Be proud of yourself and do something to remind yourself of your incredible worth. If you paint your nails this week to create a visual reminder to Be Proud of You, send me a photo and I'll add it to the collage! <3
Love you my friend!