10.4.12

Let's Spread Positivity and Kindness


Hey there everyone, I haven't had my computer for almost a week now and it is driving me nutso!  It has been hanging out at the Mac store since last Wednesday and they only just started working on it last night... As someone whose entire career/s are managed off of her computer, it has been both kind of nice to be forced to take a break from some work but also torture because when I can't work, I can't sustain myself and my businesses.  Technology is a double edged sword, it is so helpful when it's working, and other times it bites ya in the bootie.  But hopefully I'll get my computer back tomorrow and hopefully I'll be able to pay all my bills tomorrow!  Fingers crossed!

Along with that, I wanted to talk about Pinterest for a little bit.  Like I said, technology is a double edged sword.  I am amazed and honored that I have over 500,000 followers on Pinterest and on quite a few of my individual boards, I have over a million followers.  Yea, what??  Isn't that crazy insane?  I don't know how it happened because Pinterest has been pretty much the only online site that I don't use for business, only play.  I guess that just pinning what I love and finding happiness just playing around on Pinterest has made other people happy too who have found my boards.  Hooray for happy and loving community, right?
What I do need to point out though is that I have been getting a lot of really frustrating comments on my Pins lately.  It starts with one person leaving a negative comment on a pin then someone else chiming in with them, dramatizing the negative comment.  Then someone else jumps in to either defend me and my taste or just the product I pinned itself.  And then it escalates into women just straight up being nasty, demeaning and rude to each other through pointless argumentative debates on Pinterest.  Here are a couple of prime examples:

  • Women escalating to bitching each other out and putting each other down over commenting on a RING.  Just completely ridiculous.  I couldn't restrain myself from leaving a final comment on this one and I do hope the ladies who were being rude read my comment and take the words with thoughtfulness and kindness.
  • Ladies getting judgmental and dramatic over a mixed patterned outfit.  It's ok to not like a style or trend.  It's ok to have opinions, but do we need to be so rude and theatrical about it?  I would like to personally apologize to the ever so sweet Angie (Angela Bailey on Pinterest) as I saw that a woman was directly rude to Angie in the comments of this post and I was pretty frustrated reading it.  Angie, thanks for not biting back at her with demeaning words like she did to you (Smiley faces do not mask a rude comment, by the way.)  It was hard for me to not jump in and get mad at that women directly but I think we have more grace than that, right?
  • Ladies criticizing each other over the spelling of the expression "Woot" while commenting on a picture of SHOES.  Ai yi yi... pointless arguments.
  • I got really really really frustrated reading the comments back and forth on this beautiful image of a girl with piercings.  I really CANT STAND seeing people, especially women being so self righteous.  One older woman was pretty demeaning to the younger generations.  Then a younger girl gets frustrated, rightfully so, and vocalizes her thoughts but lets her words escalating to a really combative level.  Not so cool.  Then another middle aged woman who at first was pretty nice about her thoughts on the image suddenly just attacks the younger girl saying "Who you YOU think You are" and in the same paragraph says she herself RESPECTS others.  Ermm... sometimes being respectful means checking yourself and knowing when to just walk away from the conversation rather than egging others on.  Getting in arguments that escalate and escalate, generations attacking other generations, using the mask of the internet to not check yourself and your words and how you treat others... this just sucks, you guys.  It sucks.  And it makes me really sad seeing it on my Pins when I have not encouraged this sort of language.  I just pin what I love.

I've got to say that I am just sick of women treating each other badly, especially on the web, especially on my Pinterest boards.  I grew up in a lot of ways having to be my own mom, having to learn at an early age the importance of setting a good example for my little sisters, for younger generations, for peers and elders, having to make due when I couldn't find good women role models.  I care so deeply about empowering women and encouraging women to find strength in their voices.  I care about the community of women on the web, I care about how we treat each other, how we show respect and grace on the web.  I care about that fact that we all have different opinions, and we are all entitled to different opinions.  But there are times when we just DON'T need to vocalize all of our thoughts, especially when those thoughts are negative, overly dramatized and may hurt someone else.


I want to ask you friends if you would please take a pledge to be KIND and thoughtful with your words on Pinterest.  And that should spread to our blogs, our twitter, facebook, all of our social media accounts too.  It is so much easier to spread hateful and demeaning words when we are behind the safety of our computer screens, I do understand that.  It is hard to keep ourselves in check when we are rapidly typing away and not taking control of our emotions in the moment.  We are women and we have SO much greatness inside of us to spread, and to do that, we've got to keep ourselves in check when those negatives emotions arise.  We are not merely emotional beings but we have wisdom, strength and powerful minds that guide our emotions, our thoughts, and how we express those feelings and thoughts.  So let's reflect our better, more graceful, wise and kind selves on the web, and especially on Pinterest.  You and I will feel better for doing so.  Will you join in?  I would love it if you would pin the image at the top of this post to try and share this message on Pinterest.  Feel free to drag it to your desktop to post on your blog or wherever.  Let's spread a message of kindness and positivity on the web.  <3

35 comments:

  1. Hear hear!! I hate how some women are so cruel to each other! I will most definitely follow this pledge! Thank you, Moorea, for bringing this to everyone's attention and for believing in only spreading positivity!!
    ~Sara
    sarastrauss.blogspot.com

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  2. Holy cow! I'm not always on Pinterest and I rarely look at comments or comment myself but I cannot believe the comments you've received & commented on here. It's so sad and I'm glad I haven't come across it myself. I don't understand why people can't be nice, respectful and just NOT comment if they don't have something nice to say. If I don't like something I see on Pinterest I just SKIP it. I don't gawk. I'm there to pin things I like and that inspire me, which I thought was the whole point to Pinterest.

    I love that you are taking a stand and promoting kindness and positivity! Good for you!

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  3. No truer words have ever been spoken on this recent problem! I cannot believe how much negativity I have seen recently on Pinterest and other social media sites. I did notice that your Pinterest account was getting a lot of negative feedback recently, which I am sorry that you had to deal with it and thought you handled it quite well. It's definitely more rewarding to cultivate a positive community than contributing to hateful banter. I will try to help spread the word on my blog as well as Pinterest.
    Thanks Moorea for being a beacon of positivity! :)

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  4. I love the pins you put up but I've never read any of the comments, Moorea! The horrors to be discovered there! Props to you for turning a bad situation into a positive challenge! Rock on, sweet lady!
    xo S

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  5. THANK YOU for this. I haven't had too much trouble on pinterest, but I know a lot of people have, and I just don't understand why people take the time to be so nasty. I actually have a post drafted about hatred on multiple forums, so I may link to this if thats ok with you.

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  6. I definitely agree with everything you've said here and would never leave a hateful or unnecessarily negative comment on a blog ever. On the flip side, there will always be people like that out there... spreading nastiness around everywhere they go. It should never be taken personally or seriously. I would just delete the comments and move on if they were nagging at me. Like you said, all a person can do is lead by example and let people do what they're going to do. That's the nature of the internet. Free speech (however unpleasant) is always going to be present in the online world. People are ridiculous sometimes but you can't let it get under your skin. So not worth it. : )

    All the best!

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  7. WOW, I had no idea Pinterest comments were that intense. I rarely go on it these days. As always, kudos to you for expressing your opinions positively and without malice, Moorea. I love your heart.

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  8. I agree so much. Reading the comments on some of your pins... Wow, it always irks me seeing them pop up. Not because of the image, of course, but because it's rare to see one pop up without so much hate and negativity. It totally sickens me. I'm going to take this pledge and spread it as well. Thank you for bringing this to the public!

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  9. i follow you on pinterest and i'm constantly seeing those comments on your pins. sometimes they're amusing, because i can't believe that people are actually starting drama on PINTEREST! haha.
    i understand how you feel, and i would be very frustrated if i were in your situation. i am definitely taking your pledge, and i hope many others do too. a community like pinterest is about bringing people together over shared interests, not for cattiness and drama.

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  10. thank you for sharing this moorea. i hadnt realized how ugly pinterest was getting until i saw some tweets about the people commenting on yours. i was baffled that people would be so senselessly petty and mean to each other about the most ridiculous things. i completely agree with respectful web talk. ive never understood why people must be so critical of others... its like adult bullying. and it makes me so sad for the people who actually created that piece of jewelry or artwork, or wore that outfit to have to read those things. i love the way you have stood up against this. very respectfully. and you created a beautiful image that i will gladly pin!

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  11. The internet is SO WEIRD. It seriously brings out the worst in people. Keep pinning what you want to pin, girl... be it crazy mix and match patterns or piercings up the wazoo. There certainly seems to be a generation gap with a lot of Pinterest users... Is there a way to turn off the comment option? Maybe it's just not needed for a site like Pinterest. If I were in your shoes, I'd be made as eff too. I actually already am. People can be SO STUPID with the words that come out of their mouths/thoughts they transfer to the internets.

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  12. I have noticed you get some pretty ridiculous conversations going on your comments. From calling women in photos fat, to snarking back and forth about silly things. You are so right. Totally agree.

    Kacie

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  13. I agree - I see some comments that are just completely ridiculous. I think of it as a place to store inspiration, not really a place for arguments. Thank you for posting this, I think a lot of people need to take note!

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  14. How crazy! I did not know that such negative things were being said on Pinterest. I never really saw the point on commenting on pins in general either though... I feel like the Etsy forums are like that too. When I was just starting out on Etsy and looking for tips and help I would peruse the forums daily--until I realized how negative and mean people are on there. So I walked away and don't check the forums anymore. It's a bummer for me, and other new shops and such, but c-est la vie right? I can't help but think that with as many followers as you have on Pinterest, it makes sense that some percentage of people will step up and speak their minds. It's unfortunate and unnecessary, but true. Hopefully it doesn't spread to the little ol' pins that I see every day. It makes my general tummy hurt when I read those things : ( I shall re-blog this image! And of course reference it back to this awesome post. : ] Thank you for sharing!

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  15. I've never understood why there are comments on Pinterest to begin with. The whole concept is to post things you love for your own reference; what is there to comment on? If I had the kinds of comments on my pins that you have received on yours, I would be furious.

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  16. Thats so bizarre, i never even realized that was happening! I'm not a heavy pinner, so I don't read the comments much, but it's amazing how some people feel the need to be so rude. Freedom of speech is one thing, but if your choosing to follow someone, have the decency to be kind.

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  17. I don't know if this is any consolation, but apparently you're not the only one. Have you seen this created by Kate of For Me, For You?

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  18. Just when I think The People of the Internets can't get any crazier.....

    Pinterest drama??? Really???

    I'm sad for those women who feel the need to engage in that kind of behavior. Who has the time and energy for that kind of nonsense?

    Thanks for being authentic and true to yourself. That's what your 1m-plus followers know and love. xo

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  19. Hear, hear! There's no need for us to attack each other, whether in person or through the anonymity of the internet.

    It can be so hard to phrase things correctly in a moment, though; I often spend ages re-writing my comments to make it clear that I intend them in a friendly, supportive way, yet I was still attacked on one blog because somebody - not even the blog writer herself - had skim-read and misunderstood what I said. I'd love if we could all just slow down and really think about what we and other people are actually saying.

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  20. I cannot believe this is happening. I had no idea. I forget sometimes that people can be so cruel especially online. I have so much to say about this topic and how outrageous it is that people/women are behaving like this, but I think that it would just stress me out too much.

    If it was me I would take this all personally because I get sad when people say mean things, but at the same time I would tell myself these ladies clearly have person issues as well as they are people who's opinion are not even valid cus clearly they are all off their rockers.

    I WISH SO MUCH that on pinterest you could decline people following you. Especially if they leave cruel comments. I think that should be an option.

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  21. Wow that is crazy. I have pinterest and I have never had an issue actually its my favorite social site and the only one I use. I do not have Twitter or FB. I like this one bc people really can not talk much or so I thought. I would just ignore the comments you know what they say haters gonna hate.

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  22. well now you have one more follower! ;) i totally agree with you about trying to be positive on the web. When i don't like something, i just don't leave a comment, i don't see the point in saying 'i don't like that' or 'it looks very ugly to me'. Especially on pinterest: if you don't like something, then don't pin it and go see something else!

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  23. I'm all for keeping Pinterest positive!!! This life is hard enough as it is. Lets not spoil something enjoyable with negative vibes. I think of Pinterest as a huge message between friends sharing their favorite things, recipes, trends, and DIY's. Think about what kind of legacy you want to leave behind! It's our own choice to spread the love or the hate. Everything would be much easier without negativity!

    -Victoria Pasquale

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  24. Word. I've been noticing this trend lately too and it's so disheartening - especially in a place that has the potential to be such a positive, uplifting source of creativity and sharing. Thanks for standing up!

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  25. wow, I had no idea this craziness was happening on Pinterest, I'll share this post for sure!

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  26. Preach it!! Holy mooooooly! I had NO idea that this even happened over Pinterest until seeing your recent tweets regarding it and then this post today. I read over (or should say) TRIED to read over all of the comments for the ones you linked too but AY CARAMBA!!!!!!!! I could barely get through them without getting SO irritated and frustrated. What the hell...Pinterest is for fun, no? Weird...that's what I thought. I thought it was a fun place to pin photos you LIKE, not comment on photos you HATE.

    This makes me SO angry. Thanks for posting it though...I had no idea it was even happening. It also happens on other social media sites so I'm glad you posted that last photo about being your best self on the web. I'm going to re-blog this on my Around the Blogosphere post later today.

    Ay yi yi...what a mess this world is sometimes, eh?

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  27. I hate that this is the rap women receive in society. Because some women perpetuate the stereotype. I am glad that you have spoken up about this- I wondered if you would. ALSO- I think it's bizarre that this happens so frequently on your pinterest! I've never seen anything like it on anyone else's. :(

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  28. Beautiful! I saw the pic and didn't quiet understand what you were talking about... I thought you were gonna talk about all the hate quotes I see (they have such horrible attitude behind them)!

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  29. Just pinned your image/post.... so sorry that is happening to you! Sadly I just don't understand it, just like I don't understand the way people can be mean/rude to perfect strangers in passing. I guess I will never get it because I try so hard NOT to be that way. Hope your post helps others to think and use kind words in the future!

    Krista Fornear

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  30. A true classy lady you are! Well said!!

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  31. I love this post! While I love Pinterest, I usually don't read any comments on any of the images because it doesn't take long for them to get catty & hurtful. Pinterest is supposed to be about sharing things that you love, not sharing hate!

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  32. i had never seen anything like this on pinterest, i just can't imagine being that upset by one image someone pinned! i guess the fact that you're popular means that all kinds of people will follow you, which means you're going to get a mixed bag of crazy comments. hope this makes people think twice- it's just not worth it to fly off the handle that much over a ring. A RING.

    Hello, Hunters!

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  33. Holy wow, I had no idea that many people were even on Pinterest! Lol. That's amazing that you have that many followers. It makes sense - you have great style!

    That really sucks that you have so many bad comments on your stuff though. So annoying how grown women can behave like children when it feels anonymous. Good for you for calling attention to it!

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  34. I also think that comments are unnecessary. If I find something that I like and want to pin, what do I care what others think about it? It just makes no sense! I stopped using Pinterest after I pinned an idea that involved using a ketchup bottle for pancake batter. There was a back and forth argument about whether or not the idea was stupid or not. I didn't even know these people! I deleted everything and never looked back.

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  35. i can't believe all of the hate that people spread. so sad.
    i am definitely taking the pledge and spreading this badge!
    thank you for this!
    xo,
    andrea

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