Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I have had a beautiful season of life this year and I am incredibly thankful for all that is in my life. Something I have noticed in recent years is that I have on and off years. Last year was definitely a year of hardship, saying goodbye to my grandmother suddenly was probably the hardest part of it all amidst a very very rough season of life last August. And this year has been so much easier on me in every area that I think of it. But you know what, you can be inspired to be thankful in any season, be it troublesome or light and easy.
When I look back and read what I wrote on the day that my grandmother passed away unexpectedly, I am reminded that though I was really hurting, I was also incredibly grateful and thankful for the full life that she lead and so thankful that I got to be a part of it for 25 years. In hard times, it is so easy to focus on the sad things. Of course I definitely cried missing her, wishing I could have done things differently, called her more, visited her more. But above all in her passing, I felt thankful. And that is ok to cry about too. I was thankful that in my last conversation with her, she knew I appreciated her, loved her, and needed her. My grandmother probably hadn't heard me cry since I was a tiny little girl. I was and am thankful that she was my one and only grandmother, she was and is an incredible inspiration to me and I know of no other woman her age who was as strong willed, loving, passionate, driven, and honest as she.
It seems that almost everyone in my family was having a extremely difficult and painful season of life leading up to her passing. I can look back on July and August of last year and remember the pain we all were experiencing vividly. But because we were all having a very hard time it lead us each individually to reach out to her. In our times of need, she was there. In the few weeks and days before her death, she was able to really shine in her role as grandmother, mother, mentor, leader, counselor, advisor, comforter. Sometimes, we have to remember that the hardships in our singular lives are not the only part of the greater story. Sometimes we need hardships so that those around us have new avenues to love us and care for us. In this, we must be grateful for even those hardest times in life because they knock us down so hard that we must reach out and connect to others to get back up. Community and love are so worthy of thankfulness. And I am thankful for my own hardships so that I had a broken and open heart for my grandmother to fill up in her last days.
I was and am thankful she felt completely in control of her passing, and thankful that she was able to say "I love you, be careful" as her last words to my cousin. That phrase is very important to my family and we say it to each other every time someone leaves the house. Though death and being low on money and all of these other legitimately challenging experiences that are painful and difficult, we always have a choice to be thankful, to be grateful for the beauty that shines inside of our hardships. As long as there are hardships and times of pain, and as long as there are seasons of great joy and ease, we have plenty of things to be thankful for. I am grateful for my life right now and I am grateful for every experience I have ever had because it has all softened me and reminded me that the root of all great things is love & community. Thank you for being a part of my community online. May you have a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with love & happiness. I love you, be careful! xo Moorea